My Little Ballerina

Livi has been in ballet for a few months now and LOVES it! She practices all by herself, loves mastering new moves like the plie, and has really developed her balance, dancing, and even confidence... not that she was lacking that too much! She even got to have real dance photo's taken and take part in her very first recital!

For the pictures parents weren't allowed in to the room. I was so surprised but I understood how some parents could hinder the pictures a lot more than help. It was my first experience of Livi being "grown-up" enough to not need me! I think it was much harder on me than on Livi. As you can see they turned out great!

For Livi's dress rehearsal I decided it would be okay for her to have a little make-up on for the stage. She just ate it up. Thankfully, I had explained that it was only for the stage and she hasn't asked for it at home. 

Miss Coral putting some make-up on Livi before going on stage.

Waiting to go on stage...

There are four little girls in Livi's class and they all did so good for both performances. No crying and they worked the audience! When Livi came off from dancing for an audience the first time she got upset and cried to me "I want more!" She was "so proud" and kept talking about how everyone clapped for her. Uh Oh... What have we introduced her too?!

Coming off stage from the dress rehearsal! 

After the last performance they all got a ribbon. Livi was so proud!

Daddy got her flowers fitting for any Diva in the making :)

I was very proud of my little ballerina and so glad she had so much fun. We will have to see how the schedule fits and how things go with Sofie home, but Livi is hoping to be in Ballet again next season!

Finally... an Update!

In case you don't check our Adoption page regularly or missed it on Facebook, we finally got an update on the Adoption!

It turns out that the MOJ gave her approval for us to proceed with adopting Sofie on June 7th. All the papers should be at the court house by June 14th at the latest and our agency is expecting our court date to be some where between June 20-26. THAT IS TWO WEEKS PEOPLE! I really hope that my next blog post is announcing our court date.

I told my Grandma about this update today and she told me that yesterday morning she woke up from a dream where she could almost see Sofie. She said she felt sure that Sofie was coming soon and then today I showed up with the update! I know I'm not one who fully buys in to all the mystic spirituality stuff, mostly because there are so many crazies out there, but surprisingly, I do fully believe in dreams sometimes being communication from God... and I believe in anything spiritual my Grandma says. She has a direct line to God in an amazing-chills-miracles-happen-around-her kind of way. Hopefully, Oma's dream means that Sofie will be home even sooner than we are thinking :)

Opa had a really bad day today. He is aging, his health is deteriorating and he is ready to go to Heaven. He was quite out of it and sleepy for our visit today, but likes seeing the energy Livi has... as long as she isn't screeching :) Even on his worse days he always asks about Sofie. He may not always remember her name, or the details of our adoption, but it is so special to me that he always asks about Sofie specifically. I sometimes feel like maybe he is holding on just to meet her. Maybe that is a little egocentric but he has been a very big part of my life and I've heard lots of stories like that. I think we might be stopping in to Oma and Opa's house on the way home from the airport :)

So, what's next you ask? Court will legally make us parents to Sofie! Assuming the judge grants the adoption, it will take about a week to prepare the Adoption Order (paper work). Once our Bulgarian agency has the Adoption order they can apply for Sofie's new birth certificate with her new name on it and us as parents. It should take about a week to ten days. With the birth certificate, they will then apply for her passport...About another week to ten days. With her birth certificate they can also finish applying for her Canadian citizenship. Citizenship is the unpredictable beast. For our friends who adopted from Bulgaria before us, Citizenship took just over a month. They got the okay to pick their son up exactly 2 months after court. If we experience the same time line as them (and it has been pretty close so far), we will be able to pick Sofie up at the end of August.

The end of August is too late in my books... so please send up all your prayers, wishes and hopes that we get the okay to go get her sooner than that!

Feelings

I love my daughter more than I can put in to words. Livi is unbelievably wonderful. I am so happy being her mom and I am so ready to be a mom again. I feel like I have so much love to give to my second daughter but I can't let it all out yet. I have to reign it in because I don't have her and I fear something is going to keep her from me.

The weekends are the worst because I know that there is no chance of hearing anything from the agency about our court date. I ache to get word. I'm angry with the process. Why does it have to take so long? Sofie is just sitting there, hungry and unaware of what love feels like.

I'm tired of people asking about the adoption or telling me stories of people they know who have either had a wonderful successful adoption or had a terrible wait. I get just as annoyed if people don't ask about Sofie or talk about what we are going through. I understand it is my issues and no one can win on this point with me. Even though it all bugs me, it is always better to ask me about it and acknowledge my second child. Silence and avoidance is unbearable to me.

We obviously still haven't heard anything. I'm trying to hold off until Wednesday before emailing the agency again. 3 weeks ago they told us we should hear any day when our court date is and that court should be in June. Well, that was three weeks ago and mid June is a week and a half away. I don't know how to feel any more. I wish my will and love could just bring Sofie home but I am so guarded and afraid of over attaching myself in case something goes wrong in court.