Moving

Tonight is the last night I will spend in the home I grew up in. It is the only home I have any real memories. It is where I grew up in to the person I am today. I think it just hit me. I'm feeling very nostalgic. A little sad even.

This is the home that we moved to when I was 10 years old after finally being able to get away from my birth father. My mom made us a home in this house, where we felt safe. We never really felt safe before. It was our haven. Our mom was our hero.

It held me through my angry teen years. I was free to cry and hurt and smile and laugh. All those things happened a lot. This home was a secure place to come home to when I went off to college. I came back and forth while I figured myself out. I got married out of this home. Then almost ten years after I left, I moved back to this home with my family, preparing to bring Sofie home. Even though I got a lot of raised eyebrows, and felt some apprehension myself, about moving back to my childhood home and living so close to my mom, it has been one of the best decisions we ever made. This is the only real home Sofie has known. It is has been the safe haven for her, just as it was for me. She has blossomed here, just like my siblings and I did.

Now, we are leaving. I'm excited for the change. The new house is brand spankin' new and laid out so much better. We are switching with my mom to be upstairs now so she won't have any steps and the kids have a bit more room to run around. It is a beautiful house where I think we will spend many happy years. Our next baby will be welcomed home there. My girls will start school from there. I might even start to grow old there :) We'll see what life has for us. I hope this new house is as special to my kids as the one I'm leaving tomorrow is to me.

Think of my kids as we are transitioning. Livi frequently wakes up with nightmares when her world is not on routine. I don't know how this move is going to affect Sofie either. She has already been hitting more often. I hope she doesn't regress too much and takes comfort in us, rather than her surroundings. Moves are hard on everyone, but I am concerned for my kids. Pray for all of us.