Friday, May 28, 2010

Very Belated Mother's Day Post

I had meant to write something in honor of my second Mother's Day but I never got around to it. I'm feeling more relaxed at the moment so I thought I would give it another try and update you on my current state of Motherhood.

I never thought that I would end up being a Stay-At-Home Mom. I don't have the personality for it. I didn't think I would be good at it. You know the type of Mom's who just instinctively know how to relate to children and genuinely enjoys their company; who is good at cooking and crafts and whose house is always clean. I am not that person. I never even really liked kids that much. I thought I would be bored at home. I like working outside the home and conversing with other adults. We had planned that Jon would be a Stay-At-Home Dad and I would work. Plans changed.

I'm glad to say that my ideas of me being a SAHM have dramatically changed too. I think I am a great mom and I love it. There is nothing better in life than the way your child looks at you. I love that I can give my daughter the stability and routine of being home with her. I love that I can play, teach, comfort and watch her learn on a daily basis. I love the way she lights up when I come in to the room and how she giggles at me.

I'm am truly one of the most blessed mothers in the world. I have a stable home to raise my children in, with a husband who is involved and has the same parenting style as me. During our Homestudy we were asked what we disagree on in parenting and we couldn't think of anything... except for getting Livi's ears pierced. I think I might have done that if Jon didn't mind :) That's it! In two years we've only sort of disagreed on one thing when it comes to Livi! That is unheard of! Every once in a while my mom is struck in awe of how involved Jon is. She never had the support of a husband or father for her children. Jon puts Livi to bed nearly every night, feeds her, changes her diapers, holds her late at night if she's had a nightmare and takes joy in family days! I don't know what it is like to not have that support as a mother and I hope I never have to find out.

I am very thankful this Mother's day. I am thankful for the fantastic child I have been blessed with. I am thankful for an involved, supportive, hard working husband who makes being a mother easy. I'm thankful for being able to stay at home with my daughter to give her stability and routine and not having to work outside the home. I'm thankful that being a good mom has come so naturally to me. I thought I'd have to work at it a lot harder. I'm thankful for my life not being what I expected it to be. I'm thankful for the opportunity to expand my family and the hope I have for our future.

Speaking of the future I don't think it would be an appropriate Mother's Day post with out updating you on my adventure in to becoming a Mom for a second time! The adoption is progressing well. Our Homestudy is finished... except for needing to hand in a two page mini-essay. Then the report will be sent to the agency office to be finalized and we have to sign it. While waiting for that I am gathering all the documents to send to Bulgaria in what is called the dossier. The dossier is basically us on paper, also called our Paper Baby :)

Typically, once our dossier is accepted by the country, then we begin waiting for a proposal. It happened a little backwards for us since we had had a proposal before we began our Homestudy. That was due to the fact that we are adopting a child with special needs. Since it was so early, we declined for the time being and are waiting for a proposal in the correct order now. I'm not entirely sure how long it takes for Bulgaria to accept our dossier. There are also some things changing in the Bulgarian government right now that will hopefully allow more children to be internationally adopted through a smoother, less confusing process. These changes are set to take effect in June. I doubt there are going to be many proposals before these changes take effect. I'm not expecting a proposal for a few months but it would be really nice! I am REALLY hoping for the proposal of our little girl in July or August though.

I'm ready to be a mom again... I think :) I feel pregnant, in the sense that I am excited, planning, dreaming, and getting ready. I feel my heart jump when I talk about our adoption and my baby girls. I refer to my kids as "the girls" already and have begun talking to Livi about having a little sister. She looks at me like "okay, go get her now then!" I'm not a patient person so this waiting period is not the easiest on me. Hopefully this is the last Mother's Day I celebrate as a mother of one!

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Maggy's Tattoo!

For years now, Maggy has wanted a tattoo. For her 42nd birthday my sister Vanessa and I decided to give her one! I know that this may seem to some people as a bit of a controversial thing to do, but I have different thoughts on the subject. 

I think more often than not people view people with disabilities in terms of what they can't do or what they need help doing. They view them as unable or ill-equipped to make many of their own decisions. I would like to challenge anybody reading this to start thinking of those who may be "differently-abled" than themselves in terms of what they can do, first and foremost. I think that if we would rethink the way we view those who seem weaker than ourselves, we would see a lot more independence and self-value in those that apparently can't do for themselves. 

Although Maggy has Down Syndrome and is developmentally delayed in some areas, it does not change the fact that she is a 42 year old woman who has the right and dignity to succeed or to fail at the things she wants to try. My job as her sister, friend and caregiver is to support her decisions and help her where she needs a little extra help, or where she asks for it. It has been said that Maggy is developmentally between 4 and 8 years old, and no I would not let my eight year old child get a tattoo... but Maggy is not 8. She is 42 with the rights of a 42 year old. 

We discussed and explained all the risks and implications of getting a tattoo to Maggy. We had trial runs with sticker tattoo's and those 2 week Playland tattoos. She has come with us to see us get tattoos and knows the difference. She wanted a real one! We weren't sure if she would go through with it once she really felt the pain, but that was her risk to take. Worst case scenario was that she only had part of a tattoo... oh well :) She wanted to try. She had our support to get her through the painful parts and was so proud of herself when it was finished! I was pretty proud of her too :) 

Maggy told us that she wanted a bear tattoo... so we showed her 
some different pictures and she picked one.

Getting ready!

Taking a break
.
She watched every minute of getting the tattoo.

Maggy is so hardcore! 
Posing with Danno her tattoo artist with the completed product!
When she was done she was asking for another one on her other shoulder!


A close up of the tattoo she chose :) I think it completely suits her!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Monkey's and Government Jobs!

With the warmer weather we were having, I'm constantly being reminded what a little Dare Devil I have for a child! She is taking years off my life daily! How do parents live past 40?

Sitting on the toddler slide before the "incident"

She climbs everything! It terrifies me. We don't have stairs in our apartment, so she has had limited practice climbing things. She has no fear... so limited practice and no fear, scares Mommy!

We were at the park, as we have been on most sunny days recently. Instead of placidly playing on the toddler slide, or even the middle sized slide, she headed for the big kids slide that is taller than me and has a five foot, near verticle drop! Since I had been on the other side of the jungle gym, I had to run through the obstacles, yelling at her to stop, only to get there just in time to catch her flying down head first!
Walking on the balance beam!

At Jude's 2nd birthday party, I was getting tired of my stomach jumping every time she walked up and down the patio stairs so I put a box in front of them to keep her on the deck. Before I knew it she had climbed over the box and was dangling over the edge to drop down on to the tiny lip left on the other side. If I hadn't gotten too her in time and she had dropped, she would have tumble backwards down the wood stairs on to the concrete! She has NO FEAR! Is this normal?
Having a moment with a chocolate cake :)

Kisses for Daddy!

We've had some big exciting news that I haven't blogged about yet! Although, I did announce it on Facebook. Jon got the permanent position at work! Yay for government jobs! Security! The Collective Agreement on the table says that permanent staff can't even be laid off! Government perks! Flex days, vacation, travel benefits, training, etc...! Government benefits! 80-100% benefits on a lot of things that is fully paid for by CLBC! Raises every six months for the first two years and every year after that (for five more years I think)! I feel so blessed. Is it wrong for me to think that we've paid our dues and it's about time! I really am very thankful to everyone who sent prayers or happy thoughts and all that :) Thank you!

This doesn't change our decision to move to Chilliwack instead of buying a house though. We've been asked about that a lot. We still are excited to have the close support for when we are bringing our second baby home and the money we'll be able to save. It is the right decision.

I love these two Goobers!